Episode 120: Back to School Checklist for Busy Moms: What to Do Before the First Day

ITUNES | SPOTIFY

It's back to school season, and if you're anything like me, that means your brain is already running a mental checklist of book bags, lunchboxes, and school supplies. But this episode isn't just a list of errands to check off. I'm sharing everything I'm doing over these next couple of weeks to get my family (and myself) ready for the transition, from the practical stuff like schedule shifts and morning routines, to the part we don't talk about enough, which is managing our own expectations as the ones holding it all together.

I walk you through how I'm shifting bedtimes and wake times without the shock of an abrupt change, how I'm reducing decision fatigue for my kids (and me) with simple systems for lunch and breakfast, and why the way I think about this season matters just as much as anything on my to-do list.

If you've ever felt like the back-to-school transition hits you harder than it should, this is for you.

Links and resources mentioned in this episode:

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• + Click here to read the full episode transcript

  You are listening to the Life Coach for Working Moms podcast, the show where we are talking about what it actually takes to make life work as a working mom. I'm your host, Katelyn Denning, a full time working mom of three and a certified life and executive coach. I'm so glad you're here and I hope you enjoy this week's episode.   Hello, hello. Welcome back to another episode of the podcast. How are you doing this week? Happy August as well. We turn the page on a new month, and with that, I wanna devote today's podcast episode to all things back to school. Now, I know for some of you, this may be coming just in time. Maybe you're starting school this week or in the next few days, and so you're already thinking about the supplies and the change in routines. And for others of you, this might seem way too early. I know there are many schools that are not returning until September or even later. And then everyone else in between. So maybe save this one if you're not quite ready for it, rush to listen to it because you're already in the thick of it, or if you are like my kids and going back to school in the next two-ish weeks, hopefully this is perfect timing for you to start thinking about not just the ad hoc tasks and things that we need to do to prepare, but also how we set ourselves up for the transition that is back to school I do plan to do another podcast episode, I think. Don't hold me to it, but I'm feeling pretty strongly that I do wanna do another episode to talk about what this time of year and this change in seasons can mean for you outside of being the parent who gets the school supplies and the lunchbox ready and all of those things. But what does this season look like for you? I love back to school season, not just for the supplies and the back to routine, but also for the fresh energy that often strikes so many of us this time of year as we move toward the final quarter of the calendar year as well. I think there's so much opportunity for a reset in a lot of ways. So be on the lookout for that episode. Be sure to subscribe so that you get that episode automatically downloaded. But today's episode, I really do wanna focus on more of the nuts and bolts of preparing to go back to school. I've not done an episode like this before, but as I was reflecting on this back to school season, I for one am pretty nosy. I love to follow accounts on Instagram or listen to podcast episodes where other parents share the things that they do to prepare themselves and prepare their households and prepare their kids for back to school season, regardless of age. And so I thought that's what I would do for you today. I've been at this now, let's see, my oldest is going into seventh grade, so this school year I will have a seventh grader, a fourth grader, and a second grader. So I've been doing this for a few years. I like to think that I have some systems and some things figured out. There are plenty of things that we do that are rinse and repeat year over year. So I'm gonna share the things that I'm thinking about and the things that I'm doing over the next two and a half weeks to prepare myself and all of us for back to school. So maybe grab a notepad or your notes app to jot anything down that you hear me talk about and think, "Oh, I need to do that too," or, "I don't wanna forget to do that." And my big caveat before I start on this list, I am sure there are things that I am also forgetting about. So, we will figure it out as we go, and hopefully together we will come up with a complete list. And if not, you know what? We are capable, resourceful adults. We will figure it out in the moment. It's gonna be okay. , and maybe that's what we need to hear overall. It's gonna be okay. So as I was thinking about the things that I'm thinking about over the next few weeks to get us ready, I kind of broke them into some loose categories, and I'm sure as I start talking, I'll come up with other things that I'll just throw in. But here's how I've loosely sorted the tasks. First are the ad hoc, like the one-and-done tasks that we need to do to get ready. Then there are the schedule changes that we are going to have to make over the next couple of weeks. Then there are the routines , so really setting us up for successful mornings, for successful evenings, and then lastly, managing my mindset. As the holder of so many of these things, , there's so much that I, I want and need to do to support myself over the next couple of weeks. Okay, are you ready? Let's get into it. I'm just gonna go, , I would say rapid fire, but not really rapid fire. We're just gonna go through the list top to bottom. So here we are. When you think about those ad hoc tasks, those one-and-done things, first up for me is making sure that our book bags are emptied. So if your kids have done summer camp or we've done some trips as well where they've taken their book bags as a carry-on item, wanna make sure it's completely emptied out. I'm also throwing them in the wash. I do that a couple times a year. And I think my oldest might be getting a new book bag because I think he's gonna have a lot more than he needs to fit. But my younger two, we're good to reuse book bags for maybe the third, fourth years in a row. So I'll be washing those. Also gonna be pulling out their lunchboxes. Now, my kids have done camp all summer, so I know the state of their lunchboxes. I know that they are usable again for this year. I will probably do a wash of the bag. , but if you haven't touched your lunchbox in a while, this would be a great time to get it out, give it the old sniff test, make sure it's good to go for the school year. Maybe check ice packs, all of the accessory stuff that you need. Just make sure that it's all good because you don't wanna have to pack a lunch on the first day of school and realize that you don't have what you need. So- Lunchboxes and then water bottles. Again, you're probably using your water bottle on a regular basis. , I just did a deep clean of ours after we went to the beach and they were covered in sand. I'll probably do another clean right before the first day of school. But for those items, I wanna make sure book bags are clean, lunchboxes are ready, all the accessories and water bottles are good to go and labeled. Mm, that's a hard one. , I learned that the hard way, I mean. So next up for me, and we did this chore actually last night, , I am not embarrassed to say that we still had yet to go through all of the final paperwork, artwork, clean out your cubby at school stuff that came home on the last day of school in May. So we did that. Each of my kids have a small-ish bin. Basically fits an 8.5 by 11 size piece of paper, but it is rather tall, so you could get, like, picture a couple of reams of paper tall into it. And they live in a cupboard in our kitchen. And throughout the year, all homework, worksheet pages, artwork, goes into those bins. And as it's full, then we sort through it. We recycle what we don't need to save, and we set aside the really important, amazing things that we wanna look back on. , so that bin we finally emptied out. I do a keepsake box for my kids that just are stored in the basement with a file folder for each grade level. , we can only keep what fits, so that is helpful in making sure that we're not keeping too much. But that was a project that we all sat down and did together. My kids have gotten pretty good at doing it mostly themselves. I come along behind them to make sure they're not getting rid of something that is really meaningful or sentimental to me, and then we put everything into those basement memory boxes. So if you have any school papers, artwork, things from last year that you still haven't dealt with, it feels so good to just have a clean slate ready to go for the new school year, so I would highly recommend doing that. Next up then is to try on all the things. Now, I don't go through all of their clothes at back to school because honestly, it stays hot here and feels like summer all the way through September at least. So I save that for when we're turning over the wardrobes to cooler weather clothes. But if you have specific uniform requirements or anything like that, certainly you would know better than I on that front. So try those on, make sure you've got what you need, make sure they're clean, whatever, goes into that. But for our family, we are definitely trying on shoes, making sure that everybody has sneakers or school shoes that fit. We are looking at socks. This was a big one I learned a couple of years ago, when kids would go to put on socks finally after wearing Crocs and sandals all summer, and they'd have holes in them, or they would be way too small. So make sure that everybody has socks that fit and are clean and don't have holes in them. And then we also do any fall sporting equipment try-ons. So for our family, that's largely soccer in the fall, so we're looking at cleats and shin guards, because practice starts right around the same time that we go back to school, and I don't wanna be rushing around while everybody is making that transition. So try on all the things, order or shop for whatever you need. And then another one that, again, I just check now because I learned it the hard way is we are often walking to school, so again, maybe this doesn't apply to you, but I always check to make sure everybody has a functioning umbrella. So make sure that all three kids have a Functioning umbrella, and that it lives in their book bag. So my kids have water bottle in one of their water bottle pouches and their umbrella in the second one on the other side. For us. We walk to school. It really matters Of course, then you have your school supply shopping, and everybody handles this differently. I used to wait until closer to. I wanted to catch the best sales, or sometimes in our state they do this, like, sales tax free weekend, and I thought, "Oh, I need to take advantage." But it's really, to me personally, not worth the rush and the crowds and the potentially picked over inventory. So I try to do school supply shopping as early as possible. We're actually going tonight for my younger two. My oldest won't get his supply list until later this week, so I'll just take him separately. Not a big deal. I love to have that ready to go well in advance, but you do you. , I wish that our school offered, as I've seen some schools do, where you can just purchase an entire kit of the school supplies. You don't even have to go shopping. That sounds so luxurious, but also, I don't know, I do love to wander the aisles of Target or, Staples or wherever you're going for school supplies to see what else is out there. It's so fun for me. Then, let's see. Last couple of ad hoc tasks that I can think of. I'm sure I'm missing some here. Physicals, if you haven't already, if you need those for any extracurriculars or sports. , my oldest just happens to have a birthday right around this time, so he is swept up in the chaos of everyone else trying to get a physical at the same time. I know those appointments can be hard to snag, but we've been doing a couple of doctor's appointments here toward the end of summer just to avoid having to get pulled out of school once we're back in session. And then lastly, a new one for me this year. Our oldest, since he's going up to a new school, our district has the older kids ride the public metro bus. It's not a yellow school bus. And so one of the things on our list here in the next couple of weeks is to practice riding his bus route with him. He will be doing that independently with some other friends, so I'm comfortable with that. There will be a big group of them, but I want him to be very clear on the route, the bus, , where he gets on and off so that it's not something that he has to navigate on his own, especially when he's overwhelmed with all of the other changes that come with a new school Okay, so those are the one-and-done tasks that I can think of. You know, do you have to do all of these to be prepared for school? Absolutely not. You would be fine, I'm sure, , sending your kids as is with what they have. But I know for me it feels nice to have things refreshed and reset and just know that I've had my eyes on all of the things that they are gonna walk out the door with those first couple of days of school. That makes me feel more prepared. And so as you're thinking about those tasks, you don't have to do everything. Just think about the things that will help you feel the most grounded and the most prepared So next I wanna talk about schedule shifts. Now, a lot of this probably depends on what your summer has looked like. So for kids that do summer camp they have probably maintained a somewhat consistent schedule or routine. I know for my kids doing camp, they still have to wake up by a certain time, and pack their lunch, and empty the dishwasher, and get themselves dressed and ready for a day at camp. Now the hours of those camps have been Starting a little bit later, ending a little bit earlier, as they do. So that is going to be our shift. But we do wanna think about what needs to change to prepare us for the school year. So I am thinking right now over the next two weeks or so about inching our bedtime a little bit earlier, and also inching our wake times up. My husband just laid down the law last night at dinner with the kids about their new in their room time. So I, for one, know that as we've been staying up late, especially because we were on vacation last week, that going from a late bedtime to an early bedtime can be jarring. It might not be easy to just snap your fingers and fall asleep earlier. So our rule for them is just that they are in their rooms if they want to read with their book light or do a little bit of drawing until they feel sleepy. I am confident that over the next couple of weeks, that will help them, that will serve them as we go to school time. And then honestly, some of this is just going to be rip the Band-Aid off. We're gonna have to get up earlier, and then you'll be more tired that night and the nights afterward to finally hit that more ideal bedtime. But that is our progression over the next couple of weeks to just keeping an eye on that. I do not want it to be so abrupt the night before school and that first morning. But I have to say, for me too, I am also looking to adjust my mornings. With my oldest changing schools, our out the door time with him is gonna be much earlier, and I still want to hold on to my morning weightlifting sessions, my morning walks, all of the progress that I have made this summer. And so I know that that is going to require me to start those workouts earlier than I have been in the summer. And so I'm gonna be challenging myself over the next two weeks as well to start those even earlier so that I can hit my goal wake-up time by the first day of school, which for me is gonna be 5:45. So yes, it's for your kids, but also think about you. What are your sleep requirements going to be during the school year, and what is the gap that you need to close between what you've been doing now in the summer versus what you would like in the school year? And the other thing that comes up regarding schedule changes is just managing the calendar. So maybe you're seeing this as well, but we are already getting emails and Facebook group notifications about different events that are already on the calendar for school and for extracurriculars. So I've been adding those to our family calendar, making sure, for conference night that I have that blocked at least the general timeframe, and I'll adjust it later to our specific signup time or any of those other things, back to school nights. This is really a time to, Really pay close attention and make sure that you have those things on the calendar. Ooh, and here's one that I thought of. I don't know about you all, but for that first day of school in particular, I always block off a little bit of extra time on my work calendar after drop-off just for me to decompress. I know from experience that emotions can run high. We could be a little bit sleepy. We might be scrambling despite my best efforts to set us up for successful mornings. And so it is always so nice to have a little bit more space in my calendar to grab an extra coffee if I need that, to take a walk around the block, to decompress in some way before I shift gears back into my workday. So if that's something that sounds like it could be helpful to you, I would strongly encourage you to look at that first day of school and give yourself a little bit more space Next as I think about our routines and how those are going to shift, I'm thinking in particular about our mornings and our evenings, so before and after school. And what I could do, again, all optional, but what I could do to help make those as easy and as seamless as possible. I know they won't be perfect. I know that some of this is idealistic. I may not get to all of it, but these are the kinds of things that I am asking myself as I think through what those times of day look like or what I want them to look like. So maybe this will spark something for you as well. First up is my daughter and I, next week, it is on the list, we are gonna be decluttering her hair drawer. So I've shared a long time ago, we dedicated a drawer in our kitchen to her hair stuff. Now she's pretty minimalist when it comes to that, so I'm lucky in that way, but a brush, some hair ties, maybe a couple of headbands. Very basic. And though, as you know, if you have kids, stuff just ends up. It, it, like, multiplies. The hair supplies have babies overnight in the drawer. I'm not sure how it happens, but it is full. And so I know when she is rushing to get herself ready and out the door, and she wants to brush her hair and put it up, I want it to just be so easy to see and grab only what she needs. And so that is something that I know could make it easier, so we're gonna be decluttering all of her hair stuff. Again, with the socks, I'm gonna make sure everybody's are stocked, and all of the old socks with holes or anything else is pulled out, right? It's like, how do we just have what we need within arm's reach for those mornings? We're gonna be talking through with the kids, those who pack their lunch, not all three of mine do, , sort of a standard A, B lunch rotation. Now again, we're in a pretty good place with this because we've had summer camps where we've had to pack lunches, but I would still love to regroup, make sure that I'm getting the right ingredients for them to pack for their lunches. So I know a lot of other, , friends and family , and peers who do an A, B lunch, right? So you, on A days you have this, and on B days you have this. We don't need a ton of options. We don't need a ton of variety. Make it as simple as possible, and that also makes it so easy to be sure that you're stocked with what you need to pack a lunch. So that's something we're gonna be talking about. We're also gonna be talking about breakfast. This has always been a pain point for us, my kids are old enough, I'm gonna sit down and talk with them about it and come up with maybe an A option and a B option for breakfast. Same thing. I want fewer decisions for all of us. Maybe if your kids are younger you choose. And then communicate it with everybody. So I am thinking through, right, from getting dressed, teeth brushed, packing lunches, getting hair done, eating breakfast, all of the things that we need to do in the morning, how can I reduce the number of decisions that all of us need to make, and just make it easy to get what we need and get it done? Which brings me to the last thing that I always like to do with my kids, and I did this even when they were young, I think it's helped for everyone, is to verbally walk through the morning routine with everyone, ? We wanna picture ourselves getting up, getting dressed, brushing our teeth, coming downstairs, making our breakfast, emptying the dishwasher, packing our lunch, getting our shoes and socks on, loading up the book bag, making sure our water bottle is filled, right? Checking that we have our umbrella or our homework or whatever, and then we're out the door by X time. It is so helpful, not just for us to think through anything we might have missed, but also for our kids to know this is how it's going to work this year So then on the after-school evening time, this will vary depending on if you have aftercare or extracurriculars or whether they ride the bus home or you do carpool or they walk, but in general, same thing applies for after school and the evening. Think through the standard timeline of events and then of course, based on activities and commitments, that will adjust. But reviewing with my kids the after-school plans, how everybody gets home, what the expectations are when they walk in the door, which in our household is to wash your hands, put away your book bag, bring your lunchbox over to the sink, and get a snack, and similarly with breakfast and lunch options, I wanna talk to them about my expectations for after-school snacks, and I will remind them all of our kitchen close time. So I have a kitchen close time because I don't want my kids snacking right up until dinner is ready. So for us, there's a time at which the pantry, I guess maybe it's not the full kitchen 'cause I'm in there cooking, but the pantry closes. And so you can have a snack anytime after school, anytime from when you get home to when that pantry close time is, and then after that, I'm sorry, you're out of luck. Dinner will be served within the next hour, and you're gonna wait. So reminding of those expectations as well, and then also for easy meals, especially in those first couple of weeks, I plan some of my simplest meals, things that I have made a million times. I know how to do it. I know that everybody likes it. I know that it doesn't take two hours to get food on the table because honestly, our brains are so full in those first couple of weeks back to school for everybody, myself included. I do not need to be thinking hard. I just want easy. And so as you are thinking about your groceries and your meal plan for that first week or two back to school, keep it simple I've used the word expectations many times throughout, and I honestly think that is one of the biggest keys to successfully managing your mindset during a transition like back to school. You know, as the mom in the household, we hold so much all of the time, and especially during these seasons where lots of things are changing. And I also know that I can set the tone in my house, and I both love that and I feel pressured by that. Maybe you do, too. And so the best thing that I know I can do heading into these transitions is to really manage my own expectations. I remind myself over and over these next couple of weeks that there will be hiccups. There will be hiccups. There will be things that I have forgotten from this list. There will be an unexpected, , curveball thrown my way. I know it will happen, and I also know that I can figure it out. I know that it's possible that I could have some tired and cranky kids, some overstimulated kids, some kids who manage transition and change in their own unique ways, that it's gonna take more energy than just the normal routine days of life. And so I expect that. I'm not surprised by that. I'm not upset by that. I'm not frustrated that it is this way. It is all possible, and it is all okay I also expect that there will be a lot of paperwork. I used to really resent and hate all those folders of paperwork that would come home in the first week, and you have to fill them all out by the next day or whatever it is, right? Every teacher, every specials, every coach, everybody is sending all of this stuff for you to read, for you to fill out. And I realize that my frustration isn't gonna change that, not gonna make them walk it back in any way. And so now I just expect it. I know that my evenings those first couple weeks back to school are probably gonna be spent on the computer filling out forms, or for some of the old school documents, doing paper and pen at the kitchen counter. And I do my best to work it through one page, one document, one form at a time, and to make it as enjoyable as possible. But at the very least, to not be surprised by it and to not be frustrated by it. I also know that if ever there was a time for me to manage my inbox well, it's now. And I know that I cannot be required to remember everything. And so I immediately transfer to-do items out of my inbox into my to-do list. I save forms or I print them. I add filling out the form to my to-do list. There's just so much, you know. And so it is a time to really stay on top of it, and also have a system that works for you so that you do not forget things And lastly, I would remind you just as I am reminding myself that transitions do take time. I can't expect that once we get through the first day everyone will have adjusted and it will be smooth sailing from here. We may take two steps forward and one step back. We might be great for a couple of days, and then things fall apart the next week. We're moving through the transition. Transitions take time, and everyone navigates them in their own way The best thing that I can do is to remain calm, to be grounded, and to have my own processes and systems in place to make it manageable or as manageable as it can be, and to also take care of myself, hence my earlier bedtime and earlier wake-up times to make sure that I get sleep and movement, which are two of the best things that I know I can do for myself There you have it. That is my brain dump for you of all of the things that I can think of about preparing for back to school. It's a little bit longer than I anticipated. Apparently, I had a lot of knowledge to share with you. But I would love to hear from you. What else do you do during this season to prepare for back to school? Is there something I missed that you just know listeners need to know about? Send me an email, send me a DM. I would love to know. I'll be sure to share it out so that we can crowdsource and all learn from each other. But whether this, is your season now, in the near future, or not for another month or so, I'm right there with you, and I hope that you took a couple of things from this episode to maybe help you ease through that transition. All right. I will talk to you soon in the next episode. Until then, I hope you take care Thank you for listening and as always, for being a part of this working mom community. You can find everything related to this episode in the show notes at themothernurture.com/podcast, you can also find information about how I support working moms just like you through one-on-one, and group coaching, as well as access a number of resources and articles all on my website at themothernurture.com. I will see you again next week for another episode of the podcast.

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