Things Would Be Easier If I Didn't Work (Maybe I Should Quit My Job)
Maybe I should quit my job.
Have you ever thought about it?
You have an extra tough and exhausting week. Projects are piling up at work, you’re dropping the ball at home, relying on take-out and freezer meals, and you can’t see an end in sight.
It’s too much.
There’s no way you can continue working, while also taking care of things at home AND be a good mom.
Something has to give.
Since you can’t exactly quit being a mom, and taking care of your home, cooking, and all of those household responsibilities are also kind of a necessity, that leaves work.
But even saying that out loud feels strange.
If you’ve always worked, it can be jarring and a little bit scary to question what you know - the life of a professional, and now, a working mom.
Let’s pretend, for this exercise, that you have the option of not working.
(I realize that for a multitude of reasons - hello money, healthcare, and that pesky thing called retirement - this is a luxury and a privilege. But we’re just pretending, so humor me for a minute.)
Scenario #1:
You put in your two-weeks notice because you feel you have no other choice. It’s the only scenario that makes sense if you want to get out of feeling burned out and completely exhausted.
It’s not where you thought you’d be, but it is what it is.
How does it feel to be at home with your kids in this scenario? In this scenario where you felt backed into a corner and felt you had no real choice.
You'd probably feel exhausted, doubtful, resentful, relieved, disappointed, accepting, or a little bit of all of it.
Maybe you’d quickly learn that staying home is hard work. Your boss is unreasonable and the hours are long.
But you’d make the best of it. What other choice did you have?
Scenario #2:
You continue working, but you focus on changing the way you’ve been approaching life. You get better at managing your time at work, you shift your priorities at home to focus on rest, and food, and being present, and you learn how to manage your mindset when things or weeks don’t go as planned.
You’re still doing a lot, but you’re not feeling burned out or exhausted. It feels manageable. It feels doable.
Let’s say you still have this thought that you’d like to quit. And so you turn in your two-weeks notice.
How does it feel to be at home with your kids in this scenario? In this scenario where you desired to be at home with your kids and chose to quit working because you wanted to, not because you couldn’t handle it.
You'd probably feel grateful, excited, empowered, motivated, content, or a little bit of everything.
Maybe you’ll go back to work someday. Maybe you won’t. But either way will be the perfect choice for you because you'll make your choice based on what you desire instead of feeling like you have no choice.
Do you feel the difference?
Choosing something because it’s what you want, is powerful.
Choosing something because you feel like you have to, is powerless.
When a client comes to me faced with a big decision, especially one that involves her career, I challenge her to find ways to appreciate and make the most of what she has and then choose what she wants.
To take back her power by owning and changing what she can control rather than blaming and complaining about the things that are outside her control.
You control you.
What you do, how you spend your time, what boundaries you uphold, and how you think about and approach everything in your life.
It’s not really about the decision to work or to quit.
It’s about WHO you are when you make it.
Are you empowered or powerless?
Are you motivated or exhausted?
Are you grateful or doubtful?
I strongly encourage you to do the work on yourself first so that when you make a change, you’re doing it because you desire it.
If you’re feeling like you don’t have a choice, or like being a working mom is too much to handle, I want you to reach out to me. Whether you’re ready for coaching now or in the future, there are steps you can take to prepare.